The Braves lost their fifth straight game last night to the Cardinals. In good news for them Chris Carpenter returned for four scoreless innings; in shitty news for us Hudson’s elbow is still is more fucked than anyone could have imagined. As usual, Jair pitched well (7 IP, 3 ER) and the bullpen imploded (2 IP, 4 ER). In unusual news Francoeur had as many hits as he had outs, with a walk tossed in to boot! Could it be that he’s finally getting his shit together now that it won’t matter one bit? Let’s hope so; I, for one, certainly want to see him artificially inflate his numbers now that the season is ruined so he can sign that fat multi-year contract he’s so greedily, and unwisely, held out for.
I’m sorry, do I sound upset? Do I really? Well, I guess I am BECAUSE EVERY SINGLE THING THAT COULD HAVE GONE WRONG THIS SEASON DID GO WRONG AND NOW I HAVE TO HEAR SHIT FROM MY FRIENDS FROM PHILLY. DO YOU REALIZE THAT I AM ONLY 90 MINUTES FROM THAT HELLHOLE? THAT MEANS THERE ARE MORE OF THEM HERE THAN THERE ARE OF US; I’M KNEE DEEP IN SWARTHY AND UNSAVORY CHARACTERS. WHILE YOU GRIEVE IN THE COMFORT OF THE GLORIOUS AND STERILE SOUTH, CRYING ON THE SHOULDER OF EQUALLY DESPONDENT FRIENDS AND FAMILY, I’M TRAPPED HERE IN THE DARK, DIRTY MID-ATLANTIC REGION SURROUNDED BY THE ENEMY, WHO, REST ASSURED, ARE GODLESS, UNPATRIOTIC AND BADLY DRESSED. THIS IS THE WORST.
