You, Back There, Behind the Shit Storm Clouds, Oh My…It’s…Can it be Good News? It’s Been So Long I Barely Remember What You Look Like.

With the clouds finally (fingers crossed) parting to reveal the the healthy (?) return of Chipper and McCann and a possibly hangover-free evening for me full of strange ethnic food, maybe now is the time for the Braves to reel off 23 straight wins, which should be good enough to put them in second at the very least.

Yes, now that I think on it this seems highly probable; the pieces, including the death of our beloved announced, are set perfectly in place for a miraculous comeback. I’m suggesting some crazy shit here, I know, but I believe that the spirit of Skip and the bats of Chipper and McCann will lead us forth into the promised land. Lord, whatever sins I’ve committed in the past I’ve easily paid for ten times over today with this horrendous and slippery hangover; right now I’m kind feeling like you owe me one.

More Awesome News!!

Ugh and Ugh.

More later.

Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Oh Shit Please No, ad infinitum

Christ save us. My heart wouldn’t be able to withstand the suffering. Things are tough enough as they are.

It just wouldn’t be fair.

And Now A Posting That We All Knew Was Coming Sooner or Later

Mike Hampton is hurt again. This time it’s a tweaked groin. Says Nick Skinner, PR man for AA Mississippi:

“He didn’t want to take any chances with it,” said Nick Skinner, PR director for the Mississippi Braves. “He said his arm felt great.”

Sorry if I’m not exactly relieved with your prognosis, Skinner. See the following two paragraphs for an explanation of why not:

Hampton was making the sixth start of this rehabilitation assignment, having already built up to as many as five innings. He has been aiming to return to action after the All-Star break from a strained pectoral muscle that has delayed his comeback by 3 1/2 months and counting.

Hampton, who hasn’t pitched in a major-league game since August 2005 because of multiple elbow surgeries, injured his pectoral muscle warming up in the bullpen for his first scheduled start in early April.

Phew

Yunel’s injury is not as serious as feared and he is listed as day-to-day. He suffers from an inflamed rotator cuff, which sounds painful and serious but apparently is not so bad.

With 10 players currently on the DL, the Braves couldn’t afford to have their fifth most valuable position player go out for very long. He should be back in time for the Nationals series this weekend.